My baby beats your baby

No, I still don't have a baby of my own, so I'll have to use my niece. Everyone else blogs about the funny things their kids say and I was feeling left out. It's crazy, but Braeleigh is already 2 1/2. Growing up with 5 aunts and only 1 uncle she's learned to be pretty sassy. She loves playing with her imaginary friend Sammy (who is always in trouble for being naughty) Also, she is obsessed with chapstick and will always steal yours right out of your pocket or purse. These are some of my fav moments.

Brae's Dictionary
City Booty = Sleeping Beauty
Pop me = I'd like a drink of soda
Turn around = Please dance with me

Fists of Fury: I need a hug
Brae: Well, I need 4 dollars

Grandma: Your hair is so cute today.
Brae: Thank you
Grandma: I just love your hair (3 hours later)
Brae: You already said that today Grandma

Trista: Brae, quit jumping on me that hurts
Brae: But I'm just kidding
Trista: I know you're kidding, but don't do that
Brae: [Throws her hands up in disgust, sighs very loudly, and stomps off in a huff] This is her young Prince Phillip face from Sleeping Beauty

Scaredy Cat

Being scared is such a thrill isn't it? We love to go to scary movies, haunted houses, and rollercoasters all for that heart-racing, stomach-dropping high. We tend to seek out these activities, but if someone scares us intentionally then that is just not cool. Not cool for the scaree, but hilarious for the scarer. I think I may be making up words now. Growing up, my sisters and I loved to stand outside the bathroom door waiting to jump out at each other. It just doesn't get better than that. Blood-curdling shrieks are unleased, faces are distorted beyond recognition, and hands clench up in fists as if going to defense mode. You think that we'd grow out of this at some point, but it was just a month or so ago when Baby Spice attacked again. (That's my youngest sis for those that may not know.)

Operation: Give Trista a stroke happened about 8 years ago. I was living in GhettoBriar and had grabbed a bite to eat with my roomie one friday evening. Upon entering our apartment, I had just waltzed into the living room while chatting it up when I turned around and noticed my roomie standing frozen in the doorway. She was barely able to point and mutter "whiteboard". I looked into the kitchen...there was a message on our board....we're in your house! I think I may have passed out. After I regained conciousness and my sight my roomie asks:

-What do we do?
-I don't know!
The phone rings. I stupidly answer it. I can only hear heavy breathing. I hang up.
- Let's go!
-But someone's in our house!
Phone rings again. The stereo in my room comes on full blast.

I'm surprised I didn't break an ankle bolting down the stairs, but now we are in the parking lot. My roomie is crying hysterically and I'm looking concerned at our apt with the door wide open. We're dumb girls and have no idea what to do. So we decide to drive over to a friend's apt that's only 4 buildings away. Just as we are driving out onto the street we see 3 guys running after us. I'm terrified and have lost the ability to move. I start to recognize them as they get closer. I step out of the car and break down in tears when I realize that they are so-called friends of mine. They are in stitches, falling all over themselves laughing at how hilarious they are. They aren't. I'm fuming at this point and apologies are made. They're lucky I'm not smart enough to call the cops. I made the mistake of telling them that our door locks sucked and that they could be opened with a credit card. Apparently, they were just paying me a visit when they saw us leave. They let themselves in and hid in my bedroom. I share this as an example of how situations can be taken too far. I can laugh at this now, but only after many years of torment. I'll just stick to the simple yet effective bathroom scaring method.

Finally bloggin' again

I've been absent for a while and I guess I'd better get on the stick and update my blog. Starting on a bittersweet note, a couple weeks ago my dear sweet Grandma B passed away. It was definitely a sad time for us to lose her. I'm glad that she had prepared us for that moment and we were blessed to be able to say our goodbyes. She is one of the most inspirational people I've known. I'm grateful to her and my Grandpa for their kindness and generosity. Had they not opened their home to my dad, life as I know it would be non-existent. She displayed such honesty, patience and faith. I will always look to her as an example. I love and miss her dearly.

Other than that, I've just been working my tail off at the spa trying to earn some money for my trip. Unfortunately, our spa has been affected a bit with the economy. I'm lucky to have some pretty faithful clients who keep me busy. And if anyone's looking for something to do for Valentine's, we have a wonderful "date night" package that you and your loved one can enjoy together. *shameless plug* I guess if you can't make it to the spa for Valentine's, I hope you all have a Happy freakin' Valentine's Day. Nope I'm not bitter at all :)

My love-hate relationship with The Bachelor

I love The Bachelor. I always have. I've watched almost every season except for the one with "Brad" who didn't choose any of the girls. I applaud him for that. This season it's even better because it's Jason. He is an ideal candidate. He's good-looking, a caring father and all-around nice guy. I watched his heartbreak on The Bachelorette when Deanna dumped him. I couldn't believe it. I was very irrate. He's better off anyway right? Well, it's his turn now. However, as I watched the first two episodes, it makes me wonder why I keep tuning in to the show. It makes me cringe to see these women throwing themselves at him trying to make that "connection." I'm literally embarrassed. The women are so manipulating and needy I can hardly stand it. And I hate awkwardness which seems to be at every turn. Did anyone catch the lady with the vision boards? It was hilarious. She's a little too into her dog and she makes these collages of things she wants to happen. It looks like a kindergarten project. Then she visualizes these things and they come true. Yep, she was cut the first night. So much for the vision boards. Even though I barely made it through tonight's grueling episode, I will endure to the end. No matter how much I despise the event's of this show, I just can't seem to turn it off. Maybe there is a support group out there for me. Bachelor addicts anonymous.

Mascara slump

What makes an optimal mascara? What qualities do you look for? This may seem a bit trivial, but I'm in search for a superior mascara. I've been on this topic for about week now and I'm calling out for help. I have gone through endless amounts of mascara and have yet to find my ideal mascara. I've used M.A.C 'X' for a couple years now with adequate results, however, I would love to be wowed or at least just love my mascara. It seems no matter how much I spend on a tube, $3 or $30 I'm always disappointed. While watching "BLUSH - the search for the next great makeup artist" Max Factor 2000 calorie mascara was mentioned in one of the challenges. So what did I do the next day? I went to Wal-Mart of all places (since they are the only store I know of that carries Max Factor) to pick up my very own tube to try out. The first day I tried it I thought I had finally found it! Lengthening, thickening, no clumping and my eyelash curler didn't stick to it. What a glorious day! I ranted and raved about it to everyone...even my sister who is a make-up artist. Well, two weeks later my tube was already drying up. I could tell the consistency wasn't holding up, but I refused to believe it and still applied til my heart was content. Two hours later it had flaked off underneath my eye creating that "sick and dead look." Needless to say, I'm back to 'X'. I'm intrigued with L'Oreal's new beauty tube mascara. I guess this mascara coats your lashes to create a similar effect that lash extentions provide. I think this will be my next venture. Wish me luck.

Helpful Travel Tips

I'm travelling to Europe in April and I have experienced many unsolicited travel tips from my clients. I do appreciate that they're trying to help, but now I'm freaked out a little bit.

#1: "Make sure you wear your money belt. Almost everyone gets mugged." Really? Wow, I know several of my friends have been to Europe and have yet to encounter a mugger. I understand that tourists are pick-pocket targets, but I think "almost everyone" is a bit of an exaggeration.

#2: "Don't stay in hostels. Have you seen the movie Hostel?" There are many reasons I have not seen the movie Hostel. I choose not to see "R" movies and I tend to stay away from movies that show people getting tortured beyond our imaginations. I do, however, love that my clients go into graphic detail about what Hostel has to offer.

#3: "I hope you have enough money. Did you know that the dollar isn't worth as much as the Euro?" I can't believe I haven't thought of that. You mean I can't live in Europe for three weeks on $300.

Since this is my first trip overseas, let's try to make it positive advice. I'd like to know favorite places to visit, best way to travel between countries, activities I shouldn't miss, etc. I don't want to waste my trip peering over my shoulder assuming everyone's just waiting for the right moment to mug me, sleeping with one-eye-open, and begging for bread scraps to eat because I can't afford anything else.

Do dreams really come true? I hope not.

I wish I could be one of those lucky souls who get a peaceful night's sleep. I hate to report that I am not. From a very young age, I have had countless nights of restless tossing and turning only to drift asleep long enough to awake frightened or just completely confused from a dream. I had no idea that our subconcious minds could create such vivid and down-right crazy situations. Between the ages of 4-5, I awoke almost every night from a recurring nightmare and had to sleep with mommy and daddy. In this nightmare, the ghosts from Pac-Man were on a murderous rampage killing everyone. Once they had gotten to a family, the house turned gray. Once the entire town lost color I knew I had to get to my G-ma's house which was in the next town over. Sometimes I made it to her house to find safety and other times it'd already be gray. Morbid I know. Don't ask me how I was even aware of Pac-Man ghosts at that age or that murder was a concern for me.

Fortunately, I didn't have many nightmares besides this one, but I've had my fair share of dreams that are just completely insane. My recent dreams are no exception and I've decided that I need a dream interpreter or something. Many of you have delighted in my detailed illusions, but I'll skim over the highlights for the rest of y'all. 1) I was a new member of NKOTB. We were about to go on stage and I realized I hadn't learned the routine for our concert. I also had to learn how to shave my face since I never had before. Apparently, they wanted us to be that clean-cut boy-next-door. **I'm pretty sure I was still female though???** 2) My 3-year old daughter was addicted to crack/cocaine. She acted and spoke like a rebellious teenager so I slapped her for talking back to me and for being high. **I knew it was wrong because she was only 3 yet she behaved like an adolescent.** 3) I had a baby who I delivered myself only she came out in plastic doll parts and I had to assemble her myself. Then she turned into a real baby. **No I haven't watched Pinocchio lately.**

So I'm not really sure where to go from here. These are only a few examples of the multitude of dreams I've had, but if anyone knows where I can go to make sense of this craziness, let me know. I seriously need help.